Big, Fat lies we tell ourselves

I used to read magazines off the heezy. I just said heezy. Then I would read them, and realize that...I was reading the same articles over and over again. 276 ways to make your man love you! Ways to dress for your body type! Is he really that into you? Paris Hilton did something moronic, read page 134 for details! So I stopped reading them because....who needs to know this stuff anyway? Eat right, exercise, take a shower, get over him, tell him how you feel, and Paris Hilton's an idiot. Why I bothered reading how properly apply fake eyelashes, how the south beach diet doesn't work, and why the paparazzi are stalking celebrities over and over again in magazine after magazine is beyond me.

I don't read them so much anymore, but my mom bought one, so I thought what the Will&Grace, I'll read it.

And I stumbled upon this article that I really liked in the magazine Glamour.

Big, Fat lies we Tell ourselves

1). Everything would be great if I lost weight/quit my job/had a boyfriend.
No, everything would be just like it is now, except you'd weigh less, be unemployed, or have someone to watch reruns with--and theres a chance you'd be complaining about something new. Happiness and satisfaction come from within, and you're capable of appreciating the good things that are in your life right now.

2). Hard work speaks for itself, I don't need to ask for recognition.
This is the little lie that spares you the potential awkwardness of having to toot your own horn (which admittedly can be uncomfortable). But the fact is, unless you do the tooting, all you're likely to hear is silence.

3). He really loves me; he's just afraid to commit.
Why would you choose someone who won't choose you? If he's really afraid of love, then maybe you should be afraid of him.

4). They'll never know I lied.
Even if you don't get caught and life goes on, its not quite the same. funny how lying makes you think everyone else is too.

5). He cheated on her, but he wouldn't ever cheat on me.
And you believe him because he, they who lied to his last girlfriend about being faithful, promised you he'd be...faithful?

6). I just couldn't say no.
Actually, you could have, but its hard to say no when you know that not what the other person wants to hear. Figuring out your real reasons for not wanting to say it, maybe you're scared of disapproval or anger, for instance, could help work up the courage to tutter the dreaded (yet so liberating) little syllable.

7). Some people have all the luck (and I'm not one of them).
This one's a lie that undermines your power to control your destiny--and to claim the credit when good things do come your way. Because the more you believe in luck, the less you believe in yourself.

8). I can quit anytime.
The cigarettes, the boyfriend, the nonstop shopping. Telling yourself that you have a bad habit but that you could always drop it is crafty. By admitting that what you're hooked on isn't good for you, you think you're on top of things. If you're really on top if things, prove it. Quit.

9). If I looked like (insert celebrity name here) everything would be easy.
Do you really think a breezy, rejection free life is there waiting for someone just because she/he is gorgeous? Rich? Tall? Hello, Jude boinked the nanny! (Oh snap.)

10). Nobody appreciates my genius.
Maybe you are undiscovered Van Gogh. But if you're so talented, you should be able to find a way to share that brilliance with the world.

11). A little tan won't hurt.
What part of "wrinkles" and "cancer" don't you believe? Thinking you're immune from life's tough stuff is a sign that you don't value life's great stuff.

12). I don't need any help.
Denying that you need emotional support, someone to make you laugh, or just ride to the airport may feel like independence, but its often a lie that preotects you from revealing vulnerability. And nothing makes friends faster than vulnerability.

13). If I had time I'd write a book/exercise more/do better in school...etc...
You're busy, I'm busy, everybody's busy. Is lack of time a handy excuse for not doing the things you rreallly want to do but are deep down scared of failing at? Or maybe you can't admit you really don't want to do something anymore because you think letting go of an old goal is the same thing as failing. Just do it or don't do it.


Glamour Magazine, April 2006
p316-317



Well, I liked the article I don't know about you. Thought it was nice. I will update with some of my own writing soon. You just wait.